My Crazy Car Horn

I was running a little late to work, as usual. But of course, as fate would have it, the traffic was exceptionally bad that morning. I was already feeling a little rushed (thanks to my dysfunctional alarm clock that didn't feel the need to wake me up until 8 o'clock that morning), so the traffic only put me on edge. I began to check the clock on my car radio obsessively at every other minute, and when the car in front of me quit moving altogether, I subconsciously started drumming my fingers nervously on the steering wheel. You've GOT to be kidding me. Why aren't you people at work already? The traffic finally started to pick up again, thanks be to God. I sped up as much as the cars surrounding me would allow, and impatiently jerked the wheel towards my exit. I went speeding down Briley Parkway, made a hasty right onto Knights of Columbus Boulevard, connected quickly to McGavock, and took off once again at lightning speed. For all intents and purposes, I should have been pulled over, but fate finally seemed to be taking my side for a few minutes. I approached the McGavock Pike/Century Boulevard intersection, flipped on my left blinker light, and stopped behind a gold Nissan Maxima at the red light. The light was a quick one (Thank goodness!), and before I knew it I was staring at a green arrow... but the car in front of me wasn't moving (No, no, no. GO!!!). I waited a few seconds, trying to be patient, before I decided to give my horn a little tap to give the lady in front of me a... let's call it... a "helpful hint". My motives were harmless, but the action itself proved to be anything but. I tapped the button on my steering wheel, and to my utmost horror, it stuck in the down position. My horn was loudly blaring for the entire world to hear and I couldn't get it to stop. After pounding the steering wheel a few times, it finally came loose and stopped making the obnoxious sound, but it was too late. The damage was done. The woman in front of me spun around in her car seat, shook her fist at me, and went racing off. Totally and utterly humiliated, I followed suit, keeping a safe distance behind my poor, horn-honked victim. But as I began to get closer and closer to my place of employment, I began to realize that the gold Maxima seemed to be heading in the same direction. Please don't let her work at Nelson, PLEASE don't let her work at Nelson. To my total horror, the Maxima pulled into the Nelson parking lot. Oh Lord. I slowly pulled into the parking lot and began to search for a place to park. This can't be happening. The Maxima pulled into one of only two spots left, which just happened to be side by side. I drove around the parking lot once more in an attempt to find another place to park my car. ANY place! I'll park on the street!! But alas, another space was not to be found. I sheepishly pulled into the spot next to the assaulted Maxima and its driver, just as she was climbing out of her car. I slowly opened the door and crawled out of my car, hoping to go unnoticed. I followed the lady into the building from what I thought to be a safe distance, but as I entered into the foyer I found her standing in front of the elevators. Oh no! The elevator doors slid open and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. I nervously glanced in her direction and made brief eye-contact. She glared back at me through her square glasses; she was pissed. She stomped forward into the elevator as I stood only inches from the door, totally paralyzed. Do I get on this thing with her? Do I wait for the next one? I took a deep breath and stepped forward into the elevator. The doors slid shut. Floor 1... Floor 2... "Nice day, isn't it?" I heard myself saying. What? Liz, you just blared your horn at this woman and all you can think to say is "Nice day"?? The woman looked up from the newspaper she was reading and, once again, glared at me. No response. I leaned against the elevator wall in defeat and total embarrassment. The elevator came to a screeching halt at the 5th floor, the doors slid back open, and the woman marched off the elevator without so much as a glance in my direction. I need to get my car horn fixed.